Wednesday, March 12, 2003

OK. This is something that occurred to me on the train yesterday and I didn't get chance to blog it yesterday. I'm wondering if this'll start a meme but if so I'm not sure I want to put my hand up to say that I started it. I was listening to ABC's fantastic How To Be A Zillionaire from 1985, as there's a track called 15 Storey Halo that I've been trying to mix into some other stuff for my 'songs from now and then' stylee mix CD. However as it came on yesterday another thought struck me, and it was this. If I were ever to do drag (unlikely I think, but living in Sydney you should never say never) this is the song I'd love to do drag to. If you know the number, then you might be able to see (hear) what I mean. If you don't know the song, try and find it somewhere and listen to it with parading drag queens in mind. It's almost perfect - big, bold, brassy, upbeat and so almost overproduced you're left breathless by about halfway through the song (when the barbershop quartet harmonies kick in - I told you it was almost perfect!). It kicks off with a stomping beat, followed by some audacious brass stabs and a few Latin tongue-rolling rrrrrrrrrrr's. The bass rolls in like thunder in the mountains (though look where that got Toyah these days) and we're off. It's almost a big band style number updated for the 80s but still sounding good today. I'd be happy to hear it out in a club (but that's probably just me!).

"Bottle blondes and beachboys might marvel at the size
But honey something that big you know the best don't advertise
Has no-one ever told you you gotta body build to last?
But with that 15 storey deadstop you're going nowhere, and fast
10-20-30-40! 15 storey halo! 10-20-30-40! 15 storeys high!
10-20-30-40! 15 storey halo! 10-20-30-40? 7 miles wide! 7 miles wide!"

Great drag queen lyrics. I can picture the dance steps (lots of tap as you back away, fingers snapping), the hand movements (I wonder what you could do for 7 miles wide for a drag performance??) the whole shebang (no, not Ricky Martin. But then again... it's kind of Latin-y...). 2 minutes in and the song's still bowling along at 100 miles an hour at this point (you'd have to be a fit drag queen believe you me) and then we get a bit of a change. We drop down to an almost spoken next bridge:

"And so you meet this guy a regular Galahad
A real house-trained barbarian
And so you drop him like a bad habit
But anything that comes along you grab it (you grab it!)!"

This is sung with close harmonies and the song explodes again on the final "you grab it!" building up into a huge crescendo followed by some repeated lyrics and harmonies backed by sweeping synth chords as the song finally loses some of it's energy and calms to a much slower end (I'm not surprised, it's probably knackered at that point - if I were dancing to it I know I would be!!). It would probably need to fade just after the crescendo in reality as I think 5'30" is probably a little too long for a drag number. Maybe not. Maybe I'm getting ahead of myself, as it's not like it's going to happen is it? Is it?? Is it??? Maybe I should offer to produce it for some local drag queens - I kid you not there's so much oomph in that song it'd knock any crowd dead.

So, if you were to do drag (or have done), what song would you do it to and why? Comment away please.

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